The Shattered Pieces
Pain can feel shattering. There are seasons that feel as if there are broken pieces of glass scattered on the floor. Each of these pieces may represent a painful time of suffering through unexpected news, relationship problems, or a death of a loved one. But, even though life goes by, it may take longer for these shattered pieces to heal.
In my own life this is how my chronic illness mostly feels. In every small step, I'm trying my best to accept the realization that the symptoms and pain are worsening, but that is not always the reality. Sometimes there are moments I feel shattered.
Last week, I walked into a neurology appointment praying for answers to help with the severe pain or at least a solution for the fatigue. But, though there was some answers to what could potentially help me, it still resulted in sadness. From my experiences, these appointments seem to carry more concerning news. This is exactly what I encountered that afternoon.
During this appointment, I sat there listening to everything the doctor brought to my attention. There were questions I asked, but to be honest, I was not in the best mindset hearing this all on my own. There were no words to describe how it felt when more concerns came up related to my CMT. Afterwords, the tears streamed down my face, and I had to accept that with my chronic illness there will be more struggles.
How do cope with that? Have you gone through seasons when your pain either physically or emotionally continued to worsen? Maybe you are experiencing something similar to my experiences with appointments. How do you keep going when struggling in constant pain?
These questions have pondered in my head the last couple of days. After I spent time in a support group, and praying for direction, this is what I was led to.
When the pain is shattering, we must remind ourselves that God will help us through it.
God Will Carry You Through It
Friend, I want you to know it's okay to cry. Grieving is part of how we process these sudden changes in health, the loss of a loved one, and even memories from the past. Take time to cry, and pray even though if you feel there are no words left to say. God understands the pain you are enduring.
Then keep holding on to hope that it will get better. I promise you this, though the pain may seem endless, God is right there beside you. Even if no one else understands the suffering, our Heavenly Father does, and He is always constant.
As I started writing this, I felt God leading me to share a song with you each week. One that will hopefully bring you comfort and encouragement as you continue through today. Remember that even in the darkest of nights, God will help you through it.
Do you know what was amazing? As I sat down waiting to see my doctor this past week, I felt God reminding me of the lyrics to a song by Ellie Holcomb. The words "I will carry you" continued to repeat in my head. I know this was a reminder that I will be able to get through this trial. And even when I feel emotionally tired, God is there with me through every step of the way. Just like He is doing in your life right in this moment.
My prayer as you listen to these words, you will be reminded of the one who will carry you through this pain.
"I Will Carry You" by Ellie Holcomb: https://youtu.be/IziBz0d5yOk
Question: How are you comforted when the pain is shattering?